The Reality of "Man-Know-Man"

Let’s call a spade a spade. In Nigeria, the “man-know-man” (referral) culture is incredibly strong. Many lucrative jobs in Lagos, Abuja, and Port Harcourt never make it to job boards. They are filled because someone recommended a cousin, a church member, or a former colleague.

But here’s the secret: you can build your own “man-know-man” network. You don’t need to be born into a wealthy family to get referrals. You just need to be strategic, especially if you’re an introvert.

Networking for introverts is not about being the loudest person in the room; it’s about building deep, one-on-one relationships where your competence speaks for itself.

How Introverts Can Network Effectively

1. Leverage Digital Networking If walking up to a stranger at a tech mixer in Victoria Island gives you anxiety, start online. Twitter (X) and LinkedIn are goldmines. Engage meaningfully with people’s posts. Send a thoughtful DM asking a specific question. Build the relationship online first, so if you ever meet in person, the ice is already broken.

2. Focus on One-on-One Catch-ups Instead of trying to work a room of 50 people, aim for quality over quantity. Invite a senior colleague or a peer for a 15-minute virtual coffee chat. Ask about their career journey. People love talking about themselves.

3. Volunteer Your Skills Actions speak louder than small talk. Offer to help organize a community event, manage a professional WhatsApp group, or design a flyer for a non-profit. When people see you work, they trust your competence. That trust turns into job referrals.

Your Existing Network is Bigger Than You Think

Stop looking for the CEO of Dangote to be your mentor. Look at your university coursemates, your fellow NYSC corps members, and your former internship supervisors.

The guy you served with in Kano might be the HR assistant at a company you want to work for tomorrow. Treat everyone with respect, stay in touch, and don’t only reach out when you need a job. Building a genuine network takes time, but it’s the best career investment you can make in this country.